Wanted: For Crimes Against the Homestead

Fernando the Wonder Dog
Fernando the Wonder Dog

This an an all-points bulletin to be on the lookout for Fernando the Wonder Dog (FTWD).

Fernando was last seen sniffing Lady’s ear – the one he tried to bite off a few nights ago.

Following this scrap which required the rug shampoo-er to come out at 10 p.m.  FTWD was on a domestic crime spree that included:

  • digging up flower bulbs from the garden
  • stealing and eating a homemade lemon pound cake – and the wax paper and plastic bag it was stored in
  • making a tinkle in the basement b/c no one was around to let him out and he could

If you see this varmint please approach with caution.

While his bite is worse than his bark; he has not been known to bite the hand that feeds him.

If possible lure him with treats while calling 571 GET FERN to notify the appropriate parties about retrieving him.



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